“What is the capital of Peru?”
“How the fuck should I know? Go figure it out yourself, lazy ass.”
(Source: life-is-not-what-you-expected)
(Source: lost-in-the-echo2)
lay nudes at my gravestone, not flowers. flowers will wither away, but a bomb ass booty is forever
One night President Obama and his wife Michelle decided to do something out of routine and go for a casual dinner at a restaurant that wasn’t too luxurious. When they were seated, the owner of the restaurant asked the President’s Secret Service if he could please speak to the First Lady in private. They obliged and Michelle had a conversation with the owner. Following this conversation President Obama asked Michelle, “Why was he so interested in talking to you?” She mentioned that in her teenage years, he had been madly in love with her. President Obama then said, “So if you had married him, you would now be the owner of this lovely restaurant,” to which Michelle responded, “No. If I had married him, he would now be the President.”
get it girl
z snap
(Source: lvmrsmn)
“Drama Queen”
Ugh that phrase. Just ugh ugh ugh. And when used about an abuse survivor? VOMIT ON ALL THE THINGS
“are you a boy or a girl?”
bitch i might be.
So my mom and I have been working the same waitress job for 5-6 years now. She had been waitressing years before, but this is recently. Anyway, about… 15 minutes ago this guy she waited on left and told her to take care. Just that. Prior to this she had talked to him about Italy. Her people are from Florence, this and that, and she said she’s never been. She’s got 8 years of art education and she’s working a waitress job. It’s pretty… Sad and disappointing, I guess. Her and my father divorced 6 years ago and she hasn’t had a real job ever. Just been stuck in a small town she’s not from.
This man who we have never seen before tipped her 1000 dollars for a trip to Italy. Walked out, not another word.
…you know. Just when I start to lose faith in humanity….Hm.
- make a chat system
- give alerts when someone answers your ask
- REMOVE THE FUCKING ‘REBLOG AS A LINK’ THING
- FIX THAT FUCKING TUMBLR VIDEO PLAYER GOD DAMNIT
- search multiple tags at once
- MAYBE HAVE A ‘LIVE VIDEO’ BUTTON OR SOMETHING
- FUCKING REMOVE BLOGS THAT HAVE BEEN INACTIVE FOR 18 MONTHS
- REMOVE BLOGS OF PEOPLE WHO SEND HATE OR VIOLATE THE RULES OF TUMBLR (YEA IM LOOKING AT YOU, 12.9 YEAR OLDS)
- SENT FOLDER SENT FOLDER SENT FOLDER like I’m supposed to remember what I just said

